Listening is truly an art. An art of relating, appreciation and connection. When a person really listens to another, he or she is with him or her at all levels. Physically, there are only two entities that exist: the listener and the speaker. Between them, there is no barrier, let alone gadgets or mobile phones. At a mental level, there is no space for the mind to wander but rather heightened awareness to what will be communicated and without judgement. The two persons are also emotionally in sync and yet neither party is being sucked into a downward spiral.
In other words, it is almost like a meditation process. When we meditate, our monkey mind cannot remain still and needs to anchor onto something. To replace zillions of thoughts, one will identify an object and use it as a focus for our meditation. This is most often our own breath, a mantra or an image. So what makes someone a great listener is that he or she will use the other person as that object and fully attend to him or her. There is complete openness to whatever that will be taken in, just like the fact that one will not judge his or her own breath and will simply let it flow. There is purely an integrated presence. And again, analogous to meditation, when distraction arises we gradually bring our attention back to the other person.
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