Quid Pro Quo is "This For That" in Latin, or simply put, an advantage or favour given to someone as a result of what is done by another. "Give and Take", "You scratch my back, I scratch your back.", etc...have the same implication which are all to have an equal exchange. Sadly, this kind of philosophy is adopted in a lot of personal relationships in our contemporary world. However, in truly interdependent relationships where the parties involved are dependent on each other, having this way of thinking can be detrimental.
First of all, by choosing to take up such an idea means that we have entered the relationships with conditions. Such conditions often come with our own pre-set attitudes and character traits, which will serve to be filtered lens on how we see the other person. Secondly, what are considered as good behaviours and kind gestures are subject to one's individual needs and perception. Some may want to be left alone to recharge or reflect when they are stressed, while others might want to engage with their loved ones. So what is done by someone may be considered as something unnecessary or redundant by others. Frequently, this will make one party feels unappreciated or disappointed when how he or she has behaved is not what the other person desires, hence leading to a sense of inequality.
One key factor to foster growth in relationships is that they are derived with a mutual intent for personal development, may it be emotional, mental or spiritual. Another must-have is curiosity that enable you to let go of presumption and judgement. And if you can spice it up with empathy that allows you to create the space to feel what the person truly needs, that would do the trick.
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